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House Of Mirrors

When the leaves begin to turn colors and the air gets a littler crisper at night, fall festivals start taking place in cities and towns all across America. It’s a special time of year when everyone in town comes together to celebrate their community over amusement rides, chili cook-offs, and funnel cake. There is so much to see and do at the fair you don’t know where to begin.

You and a few of your friends hand over two tickets and enter one of the favorite attractions in the House of Mirrors. As everyone goes their separate ways, you get misplaced from your group and lost amongst the hundreds of mirrors. Out of the corner of your eye, you see reflections of your friends in a few of the mirrors. Numerous reflections, but only one is where you friends will be found. You try to pursue them and head towards a reflection. WHAM! Your head smacks up against a mirror. Wrong reflection.

Your second and third attempt produce similar results. Just when you think you are on the right track there comes another dead end. Frustrated and sore you give up your pursuit and head towards the exit. From the way the walls are constructed to the angles of the mirrors, the purpose of the ride is to mess with someone’s spatial and visual senses. The shapes in the House of Mirrors give the participants unusual and confusing reflections of themselves and those around them.

Whether we realize it or not, we tend to live our lives like we are in that House of Mirrors by engaging in the game of self-preservation. Even though we crave to be in relationships with others where we are known, vulnerability is something we fear at the same time.  Our culture has programmed us to keep people at arm’s length. We have grown into a society that seldom trusts the intention of other people and because of this we are often apprehensive about letting people know us.

This is not meant to imply that you don’t have close friends or anyone in your life that really knows you. But even in those relationships there are often barriers that are erected to manage an image that we want to maintain. The barrier to developing authentic relationships is self-preservation. In general, we want others to perceive us better than we even perceive ourselves. We often struggle with disappointing other people or not measuring up to some standard that always feels out of reach.

We are afraid that if we take off our masks or expose our problems, we will be rejected. At the fall carnival, we shun the rejected like the Bearded Woman, Two Headed Boy and Midget Lady to the House of Freaks. We pay our money and snap our pictures as we gaze at people who don’t fit in to normal society.  We struggle with whether others will perceive us as normal or not.

What we fail to realize is that everybody has a habit they struggle to control, a past they can’t undo, an insecurity they hide, or a flaw they are desperately trying to correct. The good news is we don’t believe anyone is normal or has it all together. Everyone is crazy. Unfortunately, if things remain the same and we allow self-preservation to exist, we hinder our spiritual formation and growth.

If we are to survive and continue to grow out of our struggles we need a community around us to encourage us. If we are more concerned with our own self-preservation we will hide behind an image that we want others to have about us. Our desire for self-preservation is often at the expense of developing authentic relationships with those around us. So how do we start? As with all things, we center on God.

If we are going to develop authentic relationships, we have to be authentic ourselves and authentic with God about where we are. Authenticity is an accurate reflection of truth. Authenticity enables us to truly reflect where we currently are in our relationship with God. Whether it is good, bad or ugly, our honesty serves as a starting point for conversations to begin and change to occur.

• There are many reasons we have for not engaging with others. What barriers are you constructing that are preventing others from seeing the real you? How is this hindering your pursuit of your One Word?

• Read 2 Corinthians 5:17-21, Colossians 2:9-10 and Psalm 139:23-24. According to these verses, what does it mean to be authentic before others and God? Would you say you are being authentic before God or engaging in self-preservation? What makes you answer in the way that you do?

Are you looking for a way to keep your word in front of you all year long? Register for a My One Word account! One of the key features of a MOW account is an online Word Journal that allows you to capture your thoughts to reflective questions like you see above. You can go back at any time to read your completed journals to see how God has been moving in your life through your word in 2010.  If you already have an account, the questions from this blog have been posted to your Word Journal — log in to your account to start your Word Journal today!

Pat The Porcupine

While on vacation, our family took a day trip to a petting zoo. Our daughters loved getting up close and personal with all the animals. The place had your normal array of animals: bunnies, chickens, pigs, sheep, donkeys and miniature horses. Yet, there was a little creature living in a pen off to the side who I never expected to see at a place like this.

When the workers introduced our group to Pat I couldn’t help but snicker from the irony of it all. You see, Pat was a porcupine and porcupines aren’t regarded as the friendliest of creatures. With thousands of sharp quills attached to their body for protection, ‘patting’ or even petting a porcupine seems like an activity which should be avoided at all costs.

Regardless of Pat being a bit more laid back and docile, his natural tendency was the same as any porcupine. If someone invades his personal space, Pat either attacks or hides. In his mind, lashing out or withdrawing are the best options on the table. His quills keep him safe. They keep him alive. But, they also leave him very lonely.

Part of me felt badly for poor old Pat. Having a relationship proves to be a tricky thing because relationships require closeness and vulnerability. How does one experience community if their first reaction to someone getting close is impaling them with a razor sharp quill? How is someone ever known if they hide in the bushes whenever another animal comes by just to say hello?

Then out of nowhere I began feeling sad for myself after realizing Pat and I have a lot in common. I might not have quills to stab another individual, but my hurtful words, judgmental tone, deflective barbs, sharp sarcasm and destructive thoughts can wound any relationship which gets too personal for my liking. The thought of others getting to know the ‘real’ me terrifies me and puts me in attack and withdraw mode.

Hiding my weaknesses, bad habits and ugly tendencies from those around me always seems to be the best course of action. This action appears to provide me with a sense of security, peace and comfort. Yet, these feelings are fleeting at best and rather than thriving, it leaves me living life alone in pure survival mode.

We need each other in order to grow and for our One Word to take root in our lives. To be fully loved an individual must be fully known. This will never take place if you have your quills raised ready to pounce on anyone who dares to see past the façade of the false self you present to the world. So, today we want to leave you with this question: How are you being a porcupine in your relationships? What can you do to be a little less ‘prickly’ today to those trying to care for you?

A Growing Soul

Our soul shrinks or expands to the size of our greatest concern. Unfortunately, many of us take the easy route by devoting a large portion of our energy and focus towards taking care of ourselves. With an individualistic mindset, our greatest concern will always remains inward.

We desperately need a growing soul so we are energized to pray for a growing concern taking place in a growing world. Over time we must begin to develop a fundamental understanding that we are all connected to one another and we cannot afford, or survive, being obsessively concerned about ourselves.

When you welcomed Christ inside your heart you said goodbye to authoring your own story. Life is now about joining a larger community (the church) whose ultimate goal is to make Christ known. This makes your pursuit of living out your One Word all the more important. Everybody’s contribution, including your own, ultimately determines the overall effectiveness of the ENTIRE body.

The call is not for us to feel bad or wish we could do more. The charge is merely to do something and realize that God has equipped you with gifts and passions that He wants you to use to make His name known. Go and put your heart and soul on the line before God by asking: Lord, what would you have me do in light of my growing concern and expanding heart? How can living out my One Word make a difference in the lives of others?

1 Corinthians 12:12-27 speaks to the fact that God has given each of us unique gifts, talents and passions. If we are honest, some of us are guilty of comparing our gifts, or perceived lack thereof, to others and pondering why we received the short end of the straw. This questioning paralyzes us, keeps us on the sidelines and enables one to rationalize their lack of action by saying their part will not be missed anyway. The Message version of this scripture goes as far as saying that until ‘you accept your part of the body does your part mean anything.’

The Church that is built on Christ is the only organization on the face of the earth that has been entrusted with what every human heart longs for and in fact needs.  We must not shirk our responsibility and make excuses for why we are not more effective. The power lies in our ability to follow Christ and demonstrate this by our love for one another. It requires trusting God will be faithful to lead us and put us in places where we will be useful to fulfilling those purposes.

You might not believe it right now, but your dedication to your One Word will determine the churches overall effectiveness of shining God’s love to the world abroad. Imagine the impact we could have if each person understood how critical his or her part of the puzzle was to the common vision. Let it start with you and let it begin by being known inside of community.

• It has been said that our soul shrinks or expands to the size of our greatest concern. How have you seen this statement to be true in your own life? In what areas do you see your soul expanding recently? What has caused your heart to gravitate towards this concern?

• Have someone read Psalm 37:4-5. How does God show us what the desires of our heart are? Do you feel the desire to be used for God or are you satisfied with where you are at the moment? How is this currently influencing your drive to live out your One Word?

Are you looking for a way to keep your word in front of you all year long? Register for a My One Word account! One of the key features of a MOW account is an online Word Journal that allows you to capture your thoughts to reflective questions like you see above. You can go back at any time to read your completed journals to see how God has been moving in your life through your word in 2010.  If you already have an account, the questions from this blog have been posted to your Word Journal — log in to your account to start your Word Journal today!