I sent this paragraph to a friend which helped me to process my decision.
“Satan plays havoc with my mind and heart but my desire this year is to keep Jesus at the forefront of my mind and His name on my lips. But I hope my attitude in this will be as one praising Him in the storm and at rest rather than a stressful attitude of dragging dreadlocks across the desert [a movie reference] in futility of thinking it’s the only way of finding Him. Constant acknowledgement of God’s supremacy is my goal. All of this thought comes from the announcer on the radio yesterday suggesting we think about what one word could be my word for the year. So the one word I thought of was “Jesus” or, after writing this to you, maybe my one word will be “acknowledgement”. Food for thought but, yup, I think that will be it.”